80+ Holiday Jokes for Kids to Enjoy All Year
Kids love to laugh, and holidays are the perfect time for funny moments! Whether it’s Christmas, Easter, Halloween, or the 4th of July, we’ve gathered the best holiday jokes for kids to keep them smiling all year long. These jokes are clean, silly, and super easy to understand, making them perfect for kids of all ages. Let the holiday giggles begin!
Christmas Jokes for Kids
1. What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!
2. Why did the ornament go to school?
To get a little tree-ning!
3. What does Santa use to measure?
A Santa-meter!
4. Why did Santa go to music school?
To improve his wrapping skills!
5. What’s a snowman’s favorite snack?
Ice Krispies!
6. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
7. What’s Santa’s favorite kind of music?
Wrap!
8. How do snowmen get around?
By riding an “icicle”!
9. What’s the Grinch’s least favorite band?
The Who!
10. Where does Santa go when he’s sick?
To the elf-care center!
11. Why was the gingerbread man kicked out of school?
He was acting too crumby!
Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids
1. What did the stamp say to the envelope?
I’m stuck on you!
2. Why did the banana go out with the prune?
Because it couldn’t find a date!
3. Why was the Valentine’s Day candy so happy?
It was sweet on everyone!
4. What kind of flower do you never give on Valentine’s Day?
A cauliflower!
5. Why did the Valentine get arrested?
For stealing hearts!
6. Why was the Valentine so shy?
It had a crush!
7. What’s Cupid’s favorite exercise?
Archery-cise!
8. What do you call a funny Valentine?
A pun-derful match!
9. What did the chocolate say to the caramel?
I’m sweet on you!
10. Why didn’t the skeleton send a Valentine?
His heart wasn’t in it.
11. What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday?
Valen-bite’s Day!
Easter Jokes for Kids
1. Why don’t you tell an Easter egg a joke?
It might crack up!
2. Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
Because the chicken had his eggs!
3. What do you call a mischievous egg?
A practical yolker!
4. What’s the Easter Bunny’s favorite kind of music?
Hip-hop!
5. Why did the Easter egg hide?
It was a little chicken!
6. How do rabbits travel?
By hare-plane!
7. Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
He was having a bad hare day!
8. What do you call an Easter egg from outer space?
An egg-straterrestrial!
9. What happened when the Easter Bunny met the rabbit of his dreams?
They lived hoppily ever after!
10. Why don’t rabbits get hot in the summer?
Because they have hare-conditioning!
11. What kind of jewelry do rabbits wear?
14 carrot gold!
12. Why did the Easter Bunny get a ticket?
For egg-speeding!
13. How can you tell which rabbit is the boss?
He’s the one with the carrot card!
14. Why was the Easter Bunny so good at gardening?
Because he had a green thumb!
See also 90+ Funny Food Jokes for Kids
Halloween Jokes for Kids
1. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?
Frostbite!
2. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
He had no body to go with!
3. What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurry?
Spooktacles!
4. What kind of pants do ghosts wear?
Boo-jeans!
5. What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese!
6. Why was the jack-o’-lantern afraid?
Because it had no guts!
7. What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The grim sweeper!
8. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
I scream!
9. How do vampires start their letters?
Tomb it may concern…
10. What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound!
11. Why do skeletons hate winter?
It chills them to the bone!
12. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o’-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi!
13. Why did the zombie go to school?
He wanted to improve his “dead”ucation!
14. Why didn’t the ghost go trick-or-treating?
He had too much boo-kwork!
15. What’s a monster’s favorite dessert?
Ice scream!
16. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange!
Thanksgiving Jokes for Kids
1. Why did the turkey join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
2. What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
Wing, wing!
3. Why did the cranberries turn red?
Because they saw the turkey dressing!
4. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
Peach gobbler!
5. What key won’t open any door?
A tur-key!
6. What do you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?
A har-vest!
7. What do you get if you cross a turkey with a banjo?
A turkey that can pluck itself!
8. What did the sweet potato say to the pumpkin pie?
I yam what I yam!
9. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?
It had 24 carrots!
10. What’s the best dance on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot!
11. What’s a pilgrim’s favorite type of music?
Plymouth Rock!
12. Why do turkeys always say, “gobble, gobble”?
Because they never learned good table manners!
13. What do you call a running turkey?
Fast food!
14. Why was the turkey at the comedy club?
He was the main roast!
15. What’s a turkey’s favorite instrument?
The pluckulele!
16. What did the gravy say to the mashed potatoes?
You complete me!
17. Why do turkeys never get into arguments?
They don’t want to ruffle feathers!
New Year’s Jokes for Kids
1. What’s a cow’s favorite New Year’s resolution?
To moo-ve more!
2. What’s a ghost’s New Year’s resolution?
To be less boo-sy!
3. What does a calendar eat on New Year’s Day?
Date-nuts!
4. Why did the firecracker go to school?
It wanted to be a little brighter this year!
5. What’s a New Year’s toast’s favorite topping?
Jam-uary!
6. What’s the most popular band on New Year’s Eve?
Coldplay (because it’s always freezing)!
7. What’s a snowman’s New Year’s goal?
To chill out more!
See also 80+ Cute and Funny Animal Jokes
All-Year Holiday Jokes for Kids
1. What’s a calendar’s favorite snack?
Dates!
2. Why did the holidays break up?
They needed space!
3. What holiday do cows love the most?
Moo Year’s Day!
4. What holiday makes math teachers happy?
Pi Day!
5. What holiday do eggs love?
Eggs-tra Special Sunday!
Conclusion
We hope these 80+ holiday jokes brought a big smile to your child’s face! From snowy Christmas chuckles to summertime 4th of July laughs, there’s a joke here for every season. Keep coming back for more kid-friendly jokes that are full of joy, laughter, and holiday cheer. Because when kids laugh, every day feels like a holiday!
